I remember the night when i met my other half i kept calling him sir and he would go bright red when i did a little curtsy to him. It was a personal joke that we both had and to say the least it still makes me laugh.

One thing i really hate is when im working in the resturant and blokes call me young lady it makes me feel like a youngster in pigtails and i should be ever so grateful that you have given me that title.

My god blokes who use that term so be sent away.

Roy; :) Yeah but that only works with the Irish! I seriously offended a drunken Estonian dude last week just because I said “Sorry I’m late – are ya rushin’?’ It took me a long time to realise why he seemed so offended.

When I used to work in Dunnes when I was in school and college, mothers used to always tell their children to ‘go ask the lady’ – the ‘lady’ being me. I always found it a bit strange seeing I was about 16 and looked 12 but I reasoned that it was a bit nicer that hearing ‘yer wan’.

Thanks Tricia! Yep, it’s not so much that I enjoy speaking to strangers so formally, but I think it’s important that somebody does it. It might be naff, but it’s a cornerstone I think.

Kelley; This is true! (Uh… That’s MR. Arsehat to you.)

Medbh; It’s easy to read tones in those sorts of situations alright, the superficiality of it is damn annoying to say the least. Chivalry is also about respect though. I know a lot of women who could do with lessons on chivalry too… is it really so hard to say thanks if I hold the door open? I find that men are far better at basic manners generally which is weird.

Nick; I don’t know about weak and incapable, respect and chivalry should be about mutual respect for fellow man/woman, regardless of their stature. Refusing respect because it feels demeaning is surely a contradiction?

Jo; There really is no Irish formality, that’s bang on… historical repression has left us belligerent! I s’pose the Irish version would be ‘A Chara’ which sounds a bit pretentious and confusing to d’forgeigners!!

I”ve been doing it since I went to the States, and while it’s a bit disingenuous sounding, especially because I tend to sound overly sincere when I’m being polite (though I actually AM that sincere) but what option is there?

I expect the bad reaction is because it sounds sort of Anglo, perhas it’s in our racial consciousness that the colonisers were Sir – our racial consciousness is an episode of the Irish RM.

I did hate being called Ma am in the states though, when I was still under twenty! That made me feel like a fat old woman. I don’t think I say Ma am here, it’s too weird.