K8 the GR8

A pair of aces grinned from the flop, the group was being cagey, the atmosphere thick.  Several players folded while they were still ahead. 

“Hey!  I have a story!”  says the magnetically interesting girl with the voice of an angel to my right.  Our attention shifted and the tension broke.

My sister’s friend has one of those pet snakes, you know those really big ones?

The conversation lapses into the dietary habits of pet snakes for a while (a rabbit?!  seriously?  live or frozen?!).

So anyway, she had this snake for years.  It grew so big that she had to stop housing it in it’s tank, and just let it sleep coiled up at the foot of her bed every night.  She loved this thing.  So, when it suddenly began to refuse it’s mice every week, she began to worry.  She marked it down to the fact that it could be shedding it’s skin and decided to leave it a while to see what happened.

The poker game was momentarily put aside.

Then, one morning she woke to find that the snake had stopped sleeping at the foot of the bed, and was now lying parallel to her body, with it’s head on the pillow.  This was seriously odd behaviour, so she brought it to the vet.  Well!  The vet listened to her descriptions of the snake’s behaviour and told her instantly to get rid of it, fast!  She was mortified, seeing as she loved this thing so much, and asked why…

(Baited breath)

“He’s sizing you up.”  he said.

We all gasped and made a similar *AAUUGGH* sound whilst imagining the feeling of waking up half way down a pet snake’s gullet.

NASTY