Because I've nothing better to do…
There is a morning show here in Ireland, hosted by Ray D’Arcy. It’s called ‘Fix it Friday’ and it’s the bee’s knees. You get a lot of silly questions like – “Where can I buy pink tights like Paris Hiltons?”, but mostly they are legit questions that everyone finds themselves wondering at one point or another. My lovely fella bought me a book last year called ‘Fixed 2 – More Answers to Ireland’s Frequently Asked Questions’ which is a really good bathroom read. I’ve picked out a few doozies for all you blog readers to mull over while supping your pints or cups of tea. I’ll tell you the answers tomorrow.
1. Is there really much Iron in a pint of Guinness?
3. Is it true that Oliver Cromwell once cancelled Christmas?
4. Who is the richest person in the world?
5. What’s the appendix for?
6. Do dogs laugh?
7. What is the difference between beer and lager?
8. Is it possible to loop-the-loop or roll a jumbo jet?
9. Can you get twin chickens?
10. Can animals be homosexual?
11. If someone looks like a horse you might describe them as equine; likewise cow features, bovine or cat-like, feline. If someone looks like a rat, how would you describe them?
11. If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do they all have to?
Now I won’t be able to sleep!
There must be some good in Guinness, back in the early 60′s my father was very ill in hospital and he was prescribed 1/2 pint of Guinness and a carton of cream every day. These were poured together into a pint glass. He had no bother drinking it.
It would not be to everyone’s taste.
7. What is the difference between beer and lager?
Nothing really. All lager is beer but not all beer is lager. There are 2 different types of yeast used in making beer. Ales are made with varieties of Saccharomyces cerevisiae. This is called a top fermenting yeast. It works best around 70F/23C. Now lagers are made with varieties of Saccharomyces uvarum. This is reffered to as a bottom fermenting yeast. It works best around 50F/10C.
Historically English beers are Ales and German beers are Lagers.
signed,
Brianf the homebrewing smart-ass
Guinness and cream sounds yummy… A little old man in a pub once overheard me asking a barman for bottles of Guinness to give to my baby (to mix with milk). He gave me this very baleful look and said “I wish you were my mammy.”
Brian: 10/10!! Sending some crates over are ya?!?
Can I just say how much it delights me that there is no #2 on that list? And two #11s? I love this new math. ;)
As for the chickens – yes, you can get twins. My grandmother lived near a poultry farm (not a mill – a real farm with grass ‘n’ stuff) and we routinely got double-yolked eggs. It’s less common from the grocery store… I have no idea why.
And my appendix was for about 23 years… and now it is no more.
Answer to 4 – Me. No money, but I have everything I need.
Answer to 5 – Putting at the end of a book
Answer to 6 – Just look at Sandy
Answer to 10 – Just look at Wouldya
Answer to 11 [a] – Bertie Ahern
Answer to 11 [b] – Of course. That’s the whole point.
Couldn’t be bothered with the rest, as doubtless you’ll put me out of my misery.
Kate, I meant to do that. So there!
Going binary on us? [in which case 2 = 10, not 11. That's 3]